The Show Must Go On/Transcript

This is a transcribed copy of "The Show Must Go On". Feel free to edit or add to this page, as long as the information comes directly from the episode.

''[The episode opens in Vox's surveillance room, as overlapping videos from various cameras stationed around the Hazbin Hotel play on the screens stationed around him. Vox himself is sitting in his office chair, watching them all while drinking from his mug]''

Vox: No fucking way! They're going to fight? Oh, my god. Hahahaha! Oh, looks like your little hotel didn't work out so well. *watches a screen with Alastor on it, which glitches slightly* Oh, Alastor, I cannot wait to watch you get FUCKED! Ahahahaha!

[Vox laughs maniacally as the camera pans away from his chair and screens] ''[The scene changes to show the cannibals all gathered outside the hotel, practising with their weapons. As Charlie watches them all from the hotel's entrance, Vaggie comes up to her]''

Charlie: Oh, I wish my mom were here to see this.

Vaggie: The cannibals seem ready to fight. Are we?

[ Sir Pentious bursts out of the hotel's doors, wearing a Victorian-style British army uniform and looking proud of himself]

Sir Pentious: Fear not, damsels. I shall have the staff ready for victorious combat!

Vaggie: What in the hell are you supposed to be?

Sir Pentious: *salutes* General Pentious, reporting for duty. I'll turn those rapscallions into soldiers in no time at all!

Charlie: Thank you, Pen.

[ Niffty, running around the hotel's entrance, now runs up to Pentious]

Niffty: What can I do to help?

Pentious: I'm glad, you asked, soldier. The base needs fortifications. Reinforce the southern wall! Create a moat around the perimeter to stop a ground assault.

[Niffty blinks up at Pentious, having no idea what he just said]

Charlie: How about this. If you see an angel, stab it! *hands Niffty a small blade*

[Niffty sees Angel Dust a few metres away, talking to Cherri Bomb, and, thinking that Angel Dust is what Charlie meant, runs towards him with her knife]

Angel: Hey, hey, hey, hey! *climbs up the pole he was leaning on*

Charlie: Not him!

[As Niffty runs off to find other things to stab, Angel does a flip and lands on the ground, before walking over to stand with Charlie, Vaggie and Pentious]

Vaggie: *drill sergeant style* Listen up, sinners! We've got 24 hours before the Extermination begins. Let's get to work. [As the cannibals and the hotel's residents begin training to fight, Vox continues to watch them all train from his surveillance room]

Vox: Oh, they suck. Oh, they suck so bad! Oh, God. They're gonna fucking die! They're- they're gonna die. [Back at the hotel, Charlie is holding Alastor's microphone, preparing to give a speech to the cannibals and the hotel's residents]

Charlie: Hello? *taps microphone* I want to thank everyone for coming. Even people who aren't staying here yet...Cherri.

Cherri Bomb: Look, I can't resist a fight, okay? Especially when I get to tag team with this fuckhead. *wraps arm around Angel, who smiles*

Charlie: Tomorrow, the Exorcists will face a Hell ready to defend itself and win!

Vaggie: Yeah! Yeah, we will! Tell 'em, baby!

Charlie: Yes! And we are-we are going to win! But in case we don't, I want you all to know... that getting to know you has been the biggest honour of my life. Whatever redemption really means, I know you all tried. I have seen the good in all of you. And it's...I-I'm just...I love you all, so much, and-and live tonight however you want because-

Niffty: We're all gonna die! *laughs maniacally*

Vaggie: *starts clapping* Alright! Let's give it up for not dying! Love not dying. *pauses* Drinks?

[Inside the hotel, the gang are sharing drinks, talking and laughing with one another]

*muddled conversation*

Sir Pentious: Here's to being alive today and not dying tomorrow!

[Alastor and Niffty watch the rest of the group drinking from the mezzanine]

Alastor: Ah, the celebratory night before a courageous last stand. It's been a surprising thrill to watch these wayward souls find connection. Almost makes one sentimental, eh, Niffty?

Niffty: I really like them, Alastor. They let me put on roach puppet shows without booing!

Alastor: Ah, an enjoyable collective to be around. I admit one could get accustomed.

[Niffty hops on top of Alastor's head and places a crown made of roaches and sticks on his head]

Niffty: I dub thee, King Roach.

Alastor: Oh, to understand your twisted little mind!

''[Alastor and Niffty begin laughing maniacally together, signaling that they possibly do understand each other's twisted little minds. Meanwhile, Angel is sitting by the parlor as Husk pours him a drink]''

Husk: Last day of afterlife, and you're not off snorting a line off some hunk's abs?

Angel: Eh, you fucked one cannibal pool boy, you fucked 'em all.

Husk: I guess you have changed.

Angel: Hey, Charlie said live tonight however we wanted... so pour me a fresh one, and let's get to living!

[As Husk pours Angel another drink, Pentious tentatively approaches Cherri Bomb, who is talking to Vaggie]

Pentious: Miss Bomb? Cherri?

Cherri Bomb: Yeah?

Pentious: I want to tell you that I...I love...I'd love to wish you good luck in the battle ahead. *shakes Cherri's hand*

Cherri Bomb: Okay.

Pentious: You are...have always have been a worthy opponent. With the most...brilliant explosive contraptions I've ever seen.

Cherri Bomb: Uh...thanks?

Pentious: Anyway, I guess...please don't die tomorrow. Okay, bye!

[Pentious runs away as Angel comes up to Cherri, passing her a shot]

Angel: You know, you could totally tap that.

Cherri Bomb: Tss, don't be gross.

Angel: Cuz, you know, I hear he's got 2 dicks.

[Cherri looks back at Pentious]

Cherri Bomb: Huh.

''[The scene cuts to Charlie, standing outside Angel's bedroom door. A few photos of Angel and the rest of the group are stuck to his door. Charlie, looks at them, smiling, before realising that she might never see them again if they lose the battle tomorrow, and begins to break down and cry]''

Vaggie: Charlie?

''[Charlie turns to see Vaggie standing in the corridor, watching her. Charlie turns away from her]''

Charlie: I'm sorry...I'm...I'm just so scared. What if we lose?

Vaggie: ♪ You've, already done so much ♪

[Vaggie begins to walk towards Charlie]

♪ So many lives you've changed ♪

♪ So many souls you've touched ♪

♪ And in the end, if it's only me you've saved ♪

Charlie and Vaggie: ♪ There's something that I've been dying to say ♪

♪ More than anything ♪

♪ More than anything ♪

♪ I Need you to know I love you more than anything ♪

♪ More than anything ♪

[Charlie and Vaggie hold eachother close and kiss as the camera slowly pans away from the two of them]

[In Heaven, the Exorcists are all lined up outside Heaven's gates as Adam gives them all a pep talk]

Adam: Extermination Day is here, bitches. We're going to go down and exterminate demon ass!

Lute: Destroy that ass!

Adam: Prepare to slaughter every sinner in that shit hotel, and you all remember Vaggie?

[The Exorcists all boo Vaggie]

Exorcists: Boo! We hate her!

Lute: Rip Vaggie's cunt mouth out her ass!

Adam: Would you just-ju-chill, Lute. Fuck. Anyway, whoever brings me Vaggie's head gets...uh, I dunno, a million Heaven bucks. How about that?

[The Exorcists all cheer]

Adam: Haha, yeah! Ladies, let's fuck shit up!

[accompanied by a guitar sting] ATTACK!!!

Lute: FORWARD!

''[Behind Adam, a portal to Hell opens and all of the Exorcists fly through it. The portal opens right outside the hotel, where Charlie, Vaggie, Angel, Pentious, Husk, Niffty and the cannibals are gathered by the entrance. Charlie has a golden shield with an apple motif, Vaggie has her angelic spear, Niffty has the small knife that Charlie gave her (and is laughing maniacally), Angel has a tommy gun, and Pentious has a short sword]''

Vaggie: Here they come. Get ready, everyone. We fight together!

''[As the group prepares to attack, Valentino, Velvette and Vox are all sitting in front of a TV in V Tower, which is showing real-time camera footage from the hotel. Valentino and Velvette look bored, with Velvette on her phone, but Vox has a box of popcorn and is excited to watch them all die]''

Vox: Oh, oh. Oh, this is going to be good!

[At the hotel, Vaggie raises her angelic spear]

Vaggie: Now! FOR YOUR SOULS!

[The group cheers and charge as the Exorcists begin pouring out of the portal, charging back at them]

Charlie: Let's FUCK THEM UP!

[As the Exorcists and the hotel group begins fighting, Alastor stands on the hotel's roof, watching the angels flying out]

Alastor: Let the slaughter begin. bw AHAHAHAHAHAHA-HA!

''[Alastor laughs maniacally as he swings his microphone, causing a huge force field to appear around the hotel which traps the attacking Exorcists inside. Adam and Lute watch in confusion from outside the force field]''

Adam: The fuck?

Lute: They appear to have some kind of shield, sir!

Adam: (sarcastically) Oh, really? I didn't see this giant fucking shield in front of me, YOU DUMB BITCH! NO SHIT!

[The force field sprouts tentacles and begins slashing at the Exorcists that are trapped on the outside of the force field with angelic weapons]

Adam: That's how they can kill us? With our own weapons?! Fucking weak, dude.

''[As Lute raises her sword and flies to attack the shield, Cherri and Angel attack Exorcists from the inside of the force field, with Angel shooting with his Tommy gun and Cherri throwing her explosives. Pentious watches them from his cannons]''

Angel: Come and get some!

Cherri: Eat shrapnel, fuckers!

Pentious: All angelic weapons fire at will!

[Husk flies past, throwing his explosive cards at angels]

Husk: Hey! yelling while fighting... doesn't help.

''[Niffty runs around stabbing every angel she can see, even the dead ones. Charlie and Vaggie are fighting back to back]''

Charlie: Alastor's shield is working!

Vaggie: Trying to focus, sweetie!

Charlie: We might actually have a chance!

Vaggie: Love the optimism. Still trying to focus.

''[Adam and Lute are still hovering over the force field. Adam clearly has had enough of being left out of the battle]''

Adam: I'm fucking over this.

''[Adam draws backwards before flying straight at the shield. With one punch, he causes it to dissipate, leaving the hotel exposed]''

Angel: Fuck!

Charlie: Oh, no!

''[As the smoke clears, Adam sees Alastor standing on the roof. Recognising him as the creator of the shield, Adam flies down to the roof to meet him. The Vees watch from V Tower, Vox preparing to see Alastor die. Vox thrusting]''

Vox: Oh, fuck! I am so hard right now!

[Alastor takes a few steps forward to meet Adam]

Alastor: Adam! First man, next to die.

Adam: Who the fuck are you?

Alastor: Alastor. Pleasure to be meeting you, quite a pleasure. I'm about to end your fucking life.

[Alastor taps his cane on the ground, causing four tentacles to rise up around him]

Adam: (sarcastically) Nice voice. Don't you know jazz is for PUSSIES!

''[Adam summons his guitar and flies straight at Alastor. Alastor stands still as his tentacles lash out at Adam. Adam slashes at them all before gearing up to attack Alastor himself]''

Alastor: Ah ah ah!

[Adam attempts to attack Alastor with his guitar, but Alastor moves smoothly out of the way, before sending more tentacles towards Adam]

Adam: You really think you can take me one? A mortal soul is no match for me, edge-lord.

Alastor: You should know better than anyone what a soul can accomplish when they take charge of their own fate.

''[Alastor's shadow looms behind him, making it appear as though there was a crack in the hotel's roof. The crack leads up to Adam, where one of Alastor's shadow monsters appears and punches Adam]''

Adam: Ohoho, you think you're tough shit, huh? *destroys Alastor's shadow monster*

Alastor: Tougher than you. Ha ha ha!

''[Adam swings at Alastor with his guitar. Alastor easily dodges his strikes]''

Alastor: You lack discipline, control, and worst, *goes into full demon form* YOU'RE SLOPPY!

[More of Alastor's shadow creatures appear, attacking Adam and crawling all over him, sending him flying upwards]

Adam: And you're...fuck-fuck you...you red piece of f-too much fucking red...fuck...shut up!

[Using one of his tentacles, Alastor grabs Adam and sends him flying into the sign on the hotel's roof]

Alastor: Ha ha ha! Poetry!

Adam: I'm going to wipe that shit-eating grin off your face, CAUSE RADIO IS FUCKING DEAD!

''[Adam flies a few metres into the air and swings his guitar, sending a shockwave towards Alastor. When it dissipates, Alastor has been forced out of his full demon form and his microphone has been snapped in two]''

Alastor: (with absolutely no static) What just happened? *notices microphone* Fffuck.

''[While Alastor is distracted by his microphone, Adam manages to score a hit on him, slashing him across the torso and sending him flying back to the edge of the roof. Vox cheers from V Tower]''

Vox: Yes! Fuck you, Alastor! *flips off screen* Ahahaha! *jumps on top of table* THIS IS BETTER THAN SEX!

[Alastor picks up the 2 pieces of his microphone, disoriented and his eyes going in and out of his full demon form]

Alastor: (singsong) Have to disagree with you there! Radio's not dead, but it is ending this broadcast.

''[Alastor flees the battle and melts into his shadow. Adam, laughing, watches him disappear while leaning on his guitar]''

Adam: Bye, bitch!

[Meanwhile, Vox watches in anger from V Tower, disappointed that Alastor wasn't dead and angry at him for seemingly being a coward and fleeing]

Vox: No! Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you! PUSSY!

[At the front of the hotel, Pentious commands the cannibals from the balcony]

Pentious: Right flank, advance! Left flank, watch your six. *addressing Charlie and Vaggie* Ladies! There are more coming up on your right. Get ready for them, Vagatha!

Vaggie: Not my name, but got it.

[Charlie is hitting angels with her shield, apologising to each of them as she does so]

Charlie: Sorry! Sorry. Sorry-sorry, sorry!

Vaggie: Now's not the time for that, babe!

Charlie: Oh, right.

''[Five angels fly at Vaggie, out to kill her. Charlie uses her firework power to explode them all]''

Charlie: DIE, MOTHERFUCKERS!

''[Husk flies around the hotel, throwing his playing cards. Angel, near him, is shooting them all with his tommy gun]''

Husk: These fucking angels won't stop coming!

[Angel laughs, his dirty mind turning it into a sex joke]

Husk: Okay, I walked right into that one.

[Angel sees an Exorcist advancing on 2 of the Egg Boiz]

Angel: Hold that thought.

''[Angel runs to defend the eggs, one of them having already been killed by the Exorcist. Angel blocks the Exorcist's sword with his tommy gun, before shooting it up with a pair of guns that were hidden in his third pair of arms]''

Angel: (to the Egg Boi) You alright, squirt?

Egg Boi: I nearly scrambled...myself.

Angel: Get somewhere safe.

''[Angel is knocked off his feet by a huge explosion. The smoke clears, revealing it to be Adam, flying above everyone and shooting angelic light from his hands]''

Adam: SUCK MY HOLY LIGHT, FUCKERS! YEAH!

Charlie: What? Alastor was supposed to handle him. Oh no, he must be-

''[Charlie and Vaggie run to safety as Adam attempts to shoot at them. Pentious watches them]''

Vaggie: We aren't going to last long unless we do something about him.

[Pentious looks up at Adam]

Pentious: Of course.

''[Cherri runs past Pentious to get to a better vantage point, holding a bomb. Pentious pulls her back down]''

Cherri: I'm trying to fight here! You out of your fucking mind?

Pentious: Yes.

[Pentious kisses Cherri, the bomb falling out of her hand and exploding behind them]

Pentious: Miss Cherri Bomb, I love you. Remember me!

''[Pentious runs off to his airship. Cherri looks back at him]''

Cherri: That was kind of hot.

''[Pentious enters his airship, the Egg Boiz lined up around the inside. As he slithers past them, they salute]''

Pentious: Eggs, activate thrusters, and charge the death ray.

Egg Boiz: Yes, sir.

''[Pentious' airship starts up and lifts itself off of the hotel. Everyone else watches]''

Charlie: Pentious?

Angel: That crazy motherfucker.

[The airship flies towards Adam, aiming the death ray at him]

Egg Boi: Target in range.

Pentious: Fire.

''[The airship edges closer and closer to Adam, the death ray charging up. Adam notices it]''

Adam: Oh, whoop!

[With one blast from his finger, Adam incinerates the airship and everyone inside it]

Adam: Haha. That coulda been ugly.

[Everyone stares in horror from the ground]

Charlie: Noo!

Angel: Fuck...

Charlie: No...

Angel: You did good, buddy.

Charlie: No, no, no.

''[Charlie, crying, sinks to her knees. Vaggie runs over to her]''

Vaggie: Charlie, I'm so sorry...

''[Charlie growls as the tears run down her face, the sadness turning into rage. She stands up]''

Charlie: Razzle! Dazzle!

''[Razzle and Dazzle fly over to her. Charlie engulfs herself in a tornado of fire and rises up. When it dissipates, she is in her full demon form and is holding a pitchfork. Razzle and Dazzle have become huge dragons]''

Charlie: Let's ride!

''[Charlie and Vaggie jump onto Razzle and Dazzle's backs and begin to fly. The rest of them watch from the ground, cheering]''

Husk: Yeah! Get 'em!

[Charlie and Vaggie fly higher and higher, towards Adam and Lute]

Charlie: Forward! Go, Razzle, go!

Adam: Oh, look who thinks they're badass now!

Lute: The traitor came to die.

''[Lute lunges down and slices Dazzle's wing clean off, causing him to roar in pain. Vaggie screams as they fall together. Lute strikes her sword in his heart as they crash through the glass ceiling and right in the lobby. Vaggie falls off, and gets up just as Lute raises her sword from Dazzle's heart, and they stare each other in the face.]''

Lute: Before I take your life, I'm going to tear that other eye out of your face.

Vaggie: Try it, bitch.

''[A fight bell rings as Lute lunges at Vaggie, Vaggie managing to throw her into the wall. Lute flies back at Vaggie and throws her to the ground, hitting her head against it repeatedly. Vaggie manages to flip her over, but Lute throws her into the wall again, before lunging at her with her sword. Vaggie dodges and Lute rams her sword into the wall. Pulling it out, she leaps at Vaggie and smashes her head into the table, breaking Vaggie's nose. Vaggie grabs Alastor's radio and hits Lute with it. As the two continue fighting, Charlie watches from atop Razzle]''

Charlie: Vaggie!

[Charlie begins to fly down to help Vaggie, but Adam appears in her flight path]

Adam: Surprise, bitch!

''[With one arm, Adam smashes Charlie into the sign on the hotel's roof. Charlie falls onto the roof as Adam flies above the hotel's sign]''

Adam: Risking your immortal life for sinners? That's some crazy shit, even for Lucifer's brat!

Charlie: These sinners are my family!

Adam: (mockingly) "These sinners are my family"! Do you even hear yourself? You should've stayed in your place, girlie-

[Charlie stabs him in the arm with her pitchfork, before swinging him around to throw him across the roof]

Charlie: That's Princess of Hell to you, pig!

Adam: The fuck? That hurts!

''[Charlie looks at him as her tail flicks. Adam stands up]''

Adam: Hehe. Okay.

[Back in the hotel's foyer, Lute throws Vaggie to the ground, knocking her spear out of her hand]

Lute: You always were weak.

''[Vaggie tries to reach for her spear, but Lute flips it off the ground and out of her reach with her foot, before driving it into Vaggie's right hand. Vaggie screams in pain]''

Lute: So, I'll spare you the pain of seeing your demon bitch die.

''[Vaggie looks up and sees that the mezzanine is on the verge of collapse. Pulling the spear out of her hand, she uses it to throw Lute off of her before revealing her newly restored wings to fly up and destroy the last pillars holding it up. Lute screams as it falls on her as plumes of sawdust ly everywhere. When it clears, the LED face has come off of Lute's mask. Lute's left arm is pinned under the rubble]''

Lute: Do it, then. Correct your mistake.

Vaggie: Seriously, you're pathetic, you know that? Ready to die rather than accepting mercy? No, live. Live knowing you only do because I let you, the failure.

''[Hearing Charlie screaming in the distance, Vaggie flies out of the hole in the hotel's roof to help her. As soon as she is gone, Lute, not accepting mercy, begins to free herself from under the rubble. She screams in pain as she pulls her left arm out of its socket, freeing the rest of her body]''

''[On the hotel's roof, Adam knocks Charlie to the ground, before picking her up by the throat. Charlie's tail and horns recede]''

Charlie: Let...me...go!

Adam: This fight was cute n'all, but it's (his mask glitches for a moment) time to die with the rest of them!

[Vaggie flies to the roof to help Charlie, but Lute flies after her and pins her to the floor]

Vaggie: Charlie!

''[Suddenly, a fist appears and punches Adam so hard that he goes flying into the hotel's sign, before falling through the roof. The person catches Charlie as it is revealed to be Lucifer, with his wings out]''

Charlie: Dad?

Lucifer: Sorry I wasn't here sooner, sweetie.

''[Lucifer lands and puts Charlie down. Adam climbs back onto the roof, half of his mask having broken off]''

Adam: Okay, seriously? How many of you freaks do I have to fight?!

[Lucifer walks up to Adam, rolling up his sleeves to fight]

Lucifer: Oh, I'm the only one that matters. You see, you messed with my daughter, and now, I am going to FUCK you!

''[Adam stares at Lucifer, perplexed. Lute and Vaggie stop their fight to stare in confusion at Lucifer. Angel cocks an eyebrow, smiling as Husk gives him a deadpanned look. The Vees stare at the screen from V Tower]''

Valentino: Well, this just got interesting.

[Charlie, slightly embarrassed, corrects her dad]

Charlie: (whispering) It's fuck you up, Dad.

Lucifer: Wait, what did I say?

''[Adam flies at Lucifer with a battle cry, smashing him into the wall. Lucifer transforms into a snake to escape and slithers into the air, before transforming back]''

Lucifer: So, this is what you been up to since Eden? *dodges Adam by turning into a goat* Gotta say, you've really let yourself go, buddy.

''[Adam grabs Lucifer by the foot. Lucifer turns into a snake briefly to free himself. Adam throws him away and Lucifer turns into a bird]''

Adam: You're judging me? You're the most hated being in all of creation!

[Adam tries to shoot his angelic light at Lucifer, but Lucifer dodges]

Lucifer: Well, your first wife didn't seem to hate what I had to offer...or the second! Bowchicka pow pow!

''[Lucifer flies away doing a little dance. Adam briefly manages to hold him in a chokehold]''

Adam: I'll fuckin' end you!

[Lucifer turns into a horse and kicks Adam away]

Lucifer: Whoa, missed me! *turns back and dodges Adam' light* Hoohoo, not even close. Haha! Nice try, douchebag!

Adam: Hold still, you slippery fucker!

''[Charlie watches the two of them fighting for a few moments before running over to help Vaggie. Meanwhile Lucifer, in the form of an octopus, has Adam wrapped up in his tentacles before Adam chucks him away, Lucifer changing back to his standard form. Adam charges up a huge blast of angelic light at Lucifer. Lucifer dodges and the light chops the hotel straight in half. Charlie screams as she falls down the middle, the entire hotel crumbling around her. Then, Lucifer swoops down and catches her.]''

Lucifer: I got ya.

''[Charlie smiles before hearing Adam's laughing. she looks and sees him charging up to them.]''

Charlie: Dad, look out!

Lucifer: Huh?

[Charlie snarls as she used her demonic powers to transform her right hand, turning it red with darken splotches, somewhat resembling Hellboy, and blocks Adam just as he was about to punch them,]

Adam: Wait, what the fuck?!

''[Lucifer stares at Adam menacingly, before they catapult him to the ground screaming, the impact leaving a blast wave of smoke, and a crater where he lay, his mask completely shattered revealing his human face. He looks up and sees Lucifer in his fully demonic form, a spark of flames emitting between his horns as his eyes glow blood red.]''

Lucifer: YOU COME AT ME, AND MY DAUGHTER! DON'T FORGET, YOU'RE IN MY HOUSE, BITCH!'''

''[Lucifer proceeds to punch Adam senselessly, fire coming from his hands as he did so, laughing at the pain he was delivering. Lucifer then summons a sphere of fire, preparing to finish him off, before Charlie comes, putting her hand on his shoulder, getting his attention.]''

Charlie: Whoa, whoa, dad. He's had enough.

''[They look down to Adam, who lies motionless on the ground. The two royals then leave the crater, still staring at Adam.]''

Lucifer: How's mercy taste, you little bitch?

Adam: No... *gets up* you don't get to end this! I'm fucking Adam! *gets out of crater and faces gang* I'm the fucking man, and you're just some fucking clown or something! I started everything on Earth! All of mankind came from these fucking nuts! You all should be worshipping me, you ungrateful, disgusting, fucking losers-

''[Just as he says these words, a small knife is stabbed through him, making Adam shout in pain. Everyone looks in shock as an angelic blade is stabbed right through his chest.]''

Vaggie: Woa-hoah!

Lucifer: Hey, y-ya got somethin' stickin' outta your...your thing there.

[Adam collapses face first to the ground, revealing Niffty on his back, having sneaked up behind and stabbed Adam.]

Charlie: Niffty?

[Niffty stares blankly at Adam for a few seconds before smiling and viciously stabbing Adam again and again, his golden blood going all over her]

Niffty: STAB! STAB STAB! Hahahaha! Haha! Hahaha! RUEAhahaha!

[The Vees stare in shock at the screen from V Tower]

Vox: Hooooolllyyyy shit!

Niffty: Blood! Hahahaha!!

[A little way away, Lute turns and looks in horror at Adam's body]

Lute: NOOOO!

''[Lute dashes up to Adam just as Niffty skips off, turning him to face her. Adam gives her a small smile before dying.]''

Lute: Sir! Stay with me sir! ADAM!

[ The others then come up to her, Charlie and Lucifer in their demonic forms.]

Charlie: It's over.

Lucifer: Take your little friends, and *demonic voice* GO HOME! *normal voice* Please.

[Lute realises that the only option she has is obeying him and picks up Adam's halo]

Lute: Retreat! All Exorcists fall back!

''[With that command, all the surviving Exorcists take off to the portal to Heaven, Lute following behind scowling. the portal then closes as Lucifer looks to the group.]''

Lucifer: Sooo....*sighs* Who's up for pancakes?

[Only Niffty raises her hand, everyone else just looks at him, unamused.]

[The scene cuts to a newsflash from 666 News]

Katie Killjoy: Good evening. I'm Katie Killjoy!

Tom Trench: And I'm-

[Katie Killjoy shoves Tom Trench out of his seat and out of the frame]

Katie Killjoy: Nobody gives a shit who you are, Tom. Breaking news - Extermination day is cancelled!

''[ Arackniss and Baxter are seen looking at a billboard which is playing the news report. The news report begins to play clips from the fight with the Exorcists]''

Katie Killjoy: Charlie Morningstar managed to fend off the angelic attack with more than just nice words.

''[In Cannibal Town, Rosie watches the news report while sipping tea, while in V Tower, Velvette watches the news on her phone. Valentino comes over and briefly looks over her shoulder, before walking away to play the same news report on his television]''

Katie Killjoy: In an unseen turn of events, our demonic head honcho Lucifer stepped in to save his daughter's ass in the last moment. We're also hearing news that Adam, leader of the angelic legions, first man and totally fuckable bad boy, has been slain by a filthy janitor.

''[From his surveillance room, Vox watches the news, which is now showing Niffty being interviewed, staring blankly at the camera. Carmilla Carmine watches the news from her office, a small smile on her face]''

Katie Killjoy: The janitor said, quote, "Charlie told me to stab, so I did". Anyway, congrats to Charlie and her crew for not being totally fucking useless for once.

''[The scene cuts to Charlie, Vaggie, Angel Dust, Husk, Niffty, Cherri Bomb and Lucifer digging through the rubble of the Hazbin Hotel. Charlie runs through the hotel with Vaggie, looking anxiously around. She sees KeeKee lying in the rubble and picks her up.]''

Charlie: Oh...there, there. It's...it's okay.

''[Charlie looks over and smiles briefly when she sees Angel and Fat Nuggets reuniting. She begins to walk towards them, but she stops when she steps on something. Charlie looks down to see the banner from Scrambled Eggs which reads "Happy first week, Sir Pentious!". Vaggie walks over to her]''

Charlie: ♪ He did it for us ♪

♪ The ultimate sacrifice ♪

♪ He gave me his trust, and look how we paid the price ♪

♪ This bloodshed could have been avoided if I convinced Heaven to work together ♪

[Charlie walks through the hotel's ruins to the edge of the precipice, where she has a clear view of the hotel's sign, on the ground]

Charlie: ♪ I took a hotel, and I destroyed it ♪

♪ I know I could have done better ♪

♪ Better, instead of letting you down ♪

[Lucifer walks over to her and places a hand on her shoulder]

Lucifer: ♪ Come on, little lady, why the frown? ♪

♪ In the last 10,000 years ♪

♪ You're the first one to change this town! ♪

[Lucifer stands in front of Charlie and points encouragingly at her]

Lucifer: ♪ You can do this! Now I know it! ♪

♪ For your story is just begun! ♪

♪ You can't quit now, hell, you owe it! ♪

♪ There's still damage to be undone ♪

♪ You've changed my mind, you've touched their hearts ♪

[Vaggie, Angel (who is still holding Fat Nuggets), Husk, Niffty and Cherri Bomb gather around the 2 of them]

Lucifer: ♪ Found the good in souls gone bad ♪

♪ The stage is wrecked, the crowd is gone ♪

♪ But by God, Charlie! ♪

♪ The show, it must go on! ♪

[Everyone else gathers around Charlie, singing encouragingly]

Vaggie, Angel, Husk, Niffty and Cherri Bomb: ♪ We can do this, we can build it ♪

♪ Best hotel that you've ever seen! ♪

♪ Twice the bedrooms, we can fill it ♪

Lucifer: ♪ With more sinners than you can dream! ♪

♪ It starts with you, ♪

Lucifer, Vaggie, Angel, Husk, Niffty and Cherri Bomb: ♪ You know it's true, fulfill your destiny! ♪

[Charlie gets up, now smiling, stands up]

Charlie: ♪ So long as I've got all of you with me! ♪

[The scene cuts to Niffty running around the hotel's ruins, picking up bricks]

Niffty: ♪ To build a hotel, I think we'll need some brick and lumber! ♪

Lucifer: ♪ Good thing we're in Hell, check out this little magic number! ♪

''[Lucifer creates huge, neat piles of bricks. Meanwhile, Angel begins to build pillars]''

Angel: ♪ Start with foundation! ♪

Lucifer: ♪ A remedial creation for me! ♪

[Lucifer, using Keekee as a gun, creates foundations]

Niffty, Angel and Lucifer: ♪ It's as easy as can be! ♪

[The scene cuts to Charlie, helping to rebuild the hotel while wiping away tears]

Charlie: ♪ No time for crying, we got a lot of work to do and, ♪

♪ We gotta try and, make the best of what's in ruins! ♪

[Vaggie and Husk help to rebuild it]

Vaggie: ♪ New coat of paint! ♪

Husk: ♪ New lights across the marquee ♪

[Charlie uses her angelic power to light up the lightbulbs]

Charlie, Vaggie and Husk: ♪ With a little sorcery! ♪

''[Meanwhile, in V Tower, Vox bursts through the doors of Valentino's room. Valentino and Velvette are already there]''

Vox: ♪ After the battle, masterless cattle! ♪

Vox and Valentino: ♪ Overlords hanging by a thread! ♪

''[As the Vees look at a board showing a mindmap of their enemies, Vox throws a knife through an old picture of Alastor. Vox is clearly visible in the frame, but has been torn out of the picture, presumably by Vox himself]''

Vox and Valentino: ♪ With a bit of bravado, maybe tomorrow ♪

♪ We'll be atop the heap! ♪

[Vox and Valentino dance together while Velvette records them, smiling]

Valentino: ♪ While the rest of Hell's pissing! ♪

Vox: ♪ Alastor's missing! ♪

Vox and Valentino: ♪ Fled with his tail between his legs! ♪

♪ Nature abhors a power vacuum ♪

♪ At least room for you and me! ♪

[Velvette comes up behind Vox and Val and puts her arms around the 2 of them]

Vox and Valentino: ♪ The future of Hell belongs to the Vees! ♪

[As the three of them laugh together, the scene cuts to Alastor, limping towards the ruins of his radio tower while holding the broken pieces of his microphone]

Alastor: ♪ This place reeks of death ♪

[Alastor enters his radio tower]

♪ There's a chill in the air ♪

♪ And I barely escaped being killed by a hair ♪

♪ "Great Alastor, altruist, died for his friends" ♪

♪ Sorry to disappoint! That is not where this ends! ♪

♪ I'm hungry for freedom, like never before ♪

[Alastor walks through his radio tower, his eyes darting around the room]

♪ The constraints of my deal surely have a back door ♪

♪ Once I figure out how to unclip my wings ♪

♪ Guess who will be pulling all the strings? ♪

''[Alastor laughs maniacally as his shadow looms above him. Meanwhile, back at the hotel, the rest of the hotel's residents are finishing off the rebuilding while putting up a painting of Pentious]''

Vaggie, Angel, Husk, Niffty, Cherri Bomb and Lucifer: ♪ We can do this! ♪ (Charlie: ♪ We can do this ♪)

♪ We'll be better! .♪ (♪ We'll be better ♪)

♪ Though redemption may take a while ♪ (♪ Though it may take a while! ♪)

♪ Wayward sinners, clear their ledger! ♪

[Alastor appears in the middle of the group, now healed]

Alastor: ♪ And we're doing it with a smile! ♪

[Everyone except for Husk and Lucifer cheer and hug Alastor]

Charlie: (spoken) Al!!

Lucifer: (spoken) Oh, this guy.

Charlie: ♪ We'll make a difference, wait and see! ♪

Charlie and Vaggie: ♪ We're gonna do this, you and me! ♪

Charlie, Vaggie, Angel, Alastor, Husk, Niffty, Cherri Bomb and Lucifer: ♪ And then tomorrow it will be a fuckin' happy day in hell!

''[All of them sing the last line while looking at the rebuilt hotel. In V Tower, Vox and Valentino tongue kiss while Velvette takes a selfie of them]''

''[In Heaven, Sera and Emily are sitting in a room together. Suddenly, Sir Pentious rises up into the room. His colour scheme has been changed to white, gold and blue and he now has a love-hearts motif]''

Pentious: What? Where-where am I? *sees Sera and Emily* Oh, hello.

''[Emily, realising that this is proof that the Hazbin Hotel works, squeaks with excitement. Sera, having come to the same conclusion, looks mortified] [The scene cuts to the ocean waves washing the beaches in Heaven. In a beach chair, a lone woman with a large fedora hat sits there, watching the sea. As her hair flows by the winds, Lute comes to her and dumps the deceased Adam's halo on the ground in front of her.]''

Lute: Adam is dead. Your deal is done and I'm in charge now. Your brat is threatening the very foundation of Heaven. And if you want to stay here, *leans down and pointing at the sea* you're going down there *points at the woman*, and stopping that bitch. You understand me...Lilith?

[The woman, revealed to be Lilith, stared up at Lute before she furrows her eyebrows from behind the sunglasses in annoyance with an ominous music playing in the background, as the episode ends.] Шоу должно продолжаться/Транскрипт