Fizzarolli/Quotes

This is a transcribed copy of iconic quotes by Fizzarolli. Feel free to edit or add to this page, as long as the information comes directly from the respective episodes.

"Truth Seekers"
"You tried the solo act, it didn't work out so well! Muwahahahaha!"

- Hallucination Fizzarolli, to Blitzo

"Ozzie's"
"Ladies and gentlemen! I see some sexy faces around here tonight! Welcome, welcome, to Ozzie's: Lust ring's number 1 place for all kinds of sick twisted fantasies. Put on display for all you 'Sleaze' and 'Sleazettes'. The gin joint of Asmodeus himself! C'mon, give him some LOVE!"

- Fizzarolli, to the audience

"I'm the one and only Fizzarolli. Some of you might recognize this dashing clown face from my numerous toy-botic replicas across the rings of Hell. Gloriously designed by the big man himself, and uh... ribbed for your pleasure tonight. We have a great lineup for you tonight, Verosika Mayday, Wet Dream, and The Squirterz!"

- Fizzarolli, to the audience

"But, as everyone's warming up, I got a funny one for y'all: Did any of you hear about the bat-shittery that happened at Loo Loo Land? Ha ha ha! Oh, yeah Oh, wow. I'll tell you what: I'd sure love to shake the hand of the crazy son of a bitch who decided to burn down that off brand shithole and then slap a fat subpoena in it, 'cause I am VERY MUCH looking to sue! That robo-me made us more money entertaining those kids than the ones we sell to get you freaks off, if you know what I mean."

- Fizzarolli, wanting to sue the people responsible for the destruction of Loo Loo Land

"Okay, keep that guy far away from me."

- Fizzarolli, unsettled at an obsessive fanboy

"The Circus"
"Hey, everybody! Look at this! it's Banana Pudding the clown horsey!"

- Young Fizzarolli, presenting the balloon horse to the crowd

"If you keep talking about pirates, I will punch you."

- Young Fizzarolli, to Blitzo

"Oh, no! Eww, no blood! Blood is disgusting."

- Young Fizzarolli, to Blitzo

"Well, Banana Pudding is here to save the day with his magical feet he dances around with. He will dance all over worm horse and make him feel better."

- Young Fizzarolli, playing with Blitzo

"Oops"
"Rise and shine, Ozzie! Huehahahahaha!"

- Fizzarolli, waking up Asmodeus

"Don't blame me, blame how fuckin' fun they are!"

- Fizzarolli, to Asmodeus, about the airhorn

"Burger time! Burger time! Burger time!"

- Fizzarolli, chanting for burgers

"Come onnnn, Ozz. I can be on my own one day!"

- Fizzarolli, to Asmodeus about going out by himself

"Ah! I can handle it! Come on, Big Daddy. Pweeeaasee?"

- Fizzarolli, to Asmodeus, giving a baby doll eyes

"Ya mind? Trying to have an un-emotional bang sesh here!"

- Fizzarolli, when he and Asmodeus get interrupted by the work assistant

"Yeah! Love. Is. STUPID!"

- Fizzarolli, agreeing with Asmodeus about the two of them not being in love

"Man, it's great not being in the spotlight for once!"

- Fizzarolli, during his walk with his Quieves

"Oh wow! Lookie who it is."

- Fizzarolli, after bumping into Blitzo again

"Yeah well, guess that's what resilience and talent gets ya. Plus, my horns were always bigger than yours. Weren't they?"

- Fizzarolli, to Blitzo

"For the record, we are NOT friends."

- Fizzarolli, about him and Blitzo not being friends when they got captured by Striker and Crimson's mafia

"Neither of you filth bags know what you're talkin' about. If you think you're superior to ANYONE, then you're no better than any royal--"

- Fizzarolli, before Striker angrily interrupts him

"Eaugh! Ever heard of mouthwash?! FUCK FAAAACCCEEEE!"

- Fizzarolli, to Striker

"Hmm... Ya know? Last time I checked, I was a FUCKING JESTER, not an escape artist!"

- Fizzarolli, when crashing his face at the top of the cage

"I just wanna go home..."

- Fizzarolli, to Blitzo

"You had a knife this whole time?!"

- Fizzarolli, to Blitzo, about his hidden knife

"I'm a performer! I sing, I dance, I promote products that I don't actualy use. I DON'T do danger!"

- Fizzarolli, to Blitzo when fighting against Crimson's goons

"I'd give you a comeback, but that'd imply I give a shit what you think."

- Fizzarolli, to Blitzo

"Ohoho, after what you DID to me?"

- Fizzarolli, to Blitzo

"An accident? Are you kidding me? You always had it out for me, 'cus people liked me better. You wanted me gone because you were jealous - just wanting the spotlight. I looked up to you, I thought you were my best friend! You ruined my life! And, then you just left me… I lost so much because of you. And, you selfish piece of shit, you didn't even care!"

- Fizzarolli, to Blitzo, about the incident

"Glad you could admit it. Want a medal?"

- Fizzarolli, to Blitzo

"So. Why didn't you try to tell me any of this? Or come see me??? Even once would've been fine!"

- Fizzarolli, to Blitzo

"I never told them that."

- Fizzarolli, when Blitzo is told that Fizzarolli didn't want to see him

"No! And no one told me you came!"

- Fizzarolli, to Blitzo before realizing the misunderstanding

"TRYING TO HAVE A FUCKIN' EMOTIONAL MOMENT HERE!"

- Fizzarolli, after Blitzo shot down one of Crimson's goons

"Look! Misunderstanding or no. It's hard to just forgive you. It's BEEN fifteen years and... That's so much time... But... I guess you didn't really ruin my life."

- Fizzarolli, to Blitzo

"It was painful... and challenging, and you know, FUCK YOU, STILL. But... It's not like I'm broken. And I now have someone who understands me and... My life has actually been pretty great."

- Fizzarolli, to Blitzo

"Oh yeah, it's been... fantastic... Uh, cuz you know, it's a great gig! And... and... And he's got the BIGGEST COCK! You know? Like MASSIVE! I mean imagine like... THE BIGGEST, JUST A GIANT, HUGE LIKE A KAIJU. But it's a COCK, you know what I mean? LIKE A BIG MONSTER. It's BIG, it's HUGE..."

- Fizzarolli, to Blitzo, about Asmodeus

"You're still on the horse thing?!"

- Fizzarolli, to Blitzo, about his horse obsession

"Ohhohooo! One distraction, comin' up!"

- Fizzarolli, to Blitzo

"You know, you're actually pretty good at this action-hero bullshit."

- Fizzarolli, to Blitzo after making an escape

"Ok... Is it bad that I'm getting hard?"

- Fizzarolli, when being held hostage by Striker

"YOU BLEW ME UP AGAIN, YOU FUCKIN PRICK!"

- Fizzarolli, after Blitzo saves his life

"Ozz... You know there's eyes around..."

- Fizzarolli, to Asmodeus, when the employees notice them together

"Well, don't worry. Today I learn that I hate going outside!"

- Fizzarolli, to Asmodeus

"Soooo... besides my whole scary hostage thing, how was your day?"

- Fizzarolli, asking Asmodeus about his day

"Meh... Fuck it... Let him have it."

- Fizzarolli, to Asmodeus

"Yeah, why not? You could say... He earned it"

- Fizzarolli, to Asmodeus, about giving Blitzo the Asmodean Crystal

"Now, I don't know about you, but having a violent brush with crime has given me a whole mess of new kinks! You wanna go... "make a mess?""

- Fizzarolli, to Asmodeus

Физзаролли/Цитаты